Yes, I like to end the week with a little whodunnit too.
So, who do you think sent me this message to my phone this evening? Answers on a post office in a spraypaint colour of your own choosing. Personally, I know where my suspicions lie. And they lie with Joinee Bing. I should explain my reasoning:
Yesterday lunchtime I had my hair cut at A Cut Above on South Street. I left work at 1pm, rushed into town, stuffed a large Oggy Oggy pasty into my face, and made it to the barbers' for approximately 1.25pm. Five minutes later my haircut commenced. This left me approximately 15 minutes before I would have to rush back to work. The haircut was happily completed within this meagre margin of error.
Now, my hair was getting rather long. It was in fact October when I last had my haircut, making a healthy 7 months' growing period, and yesterday was my sixth haircut in a two year period. Anyone who has known me in this time would agree that a haircut for me has become something of an event, and this was no exception. My hair is now significantly shorter than it was 36 hours ago.
Bearing this in mind, imagine my surprise then when I returned to work at 2pm, having left just an hour before with a hedge on my head, and no one noticed the change. My brother Anthony noticed immediately that evening, yet the first person to comment made said comment at approximately 11.30am today. And it was thus:
"Gosh, you're looking smart today."
This comment came as something of a shock, as in my four weeks working there I have only ever heard people complimenting my replacee, Darani, on her appearance. I didn't initially realise she was talking to me. Perhaps, though, this is some perk of the job, and as I take over more of the responsibilities, I will also earn some more of the perks.
So far, then, a pretty ordinary tale. Until 19.13pm, when I received the mystery text message. At first I though it must be someone who had seen me today with the shorter hair, and whose number I have erased, by design or fault, from my phone. However, I dismissed this theory quickly, as I know of no such person in Exeter.
So, I surmised that the most likely candidate would be someone very silly who by complete coincidence had decided to compliment me on my hair the very day after I had had it cut. So, I sent a reply:
"Huh? Who is this?"
Eloquent as ever, I'm sure you'll agree. Moments later came the reply to the reply:
"Why, it's your mystery complimenter!! Bwah hah ha hah ha!"
Now, this was someone clearly very silly and I immediately narrowed it down to three people, all girls. Two would have to be using a friend's phone, deliberately teasing me. The third could be using her own phone, as I don't have her number, and deliberately teasing me.
The giveaway would have to be the letter "B". All other people I know start their evil laughs with the letter "M", and I'm pretty sure that this person starts hers with the letter "B". And that person is Joinee Bing. Add the fact that she would have been the third joinee to text message me today, and the well known rule that all things come in threes (except Yorkie bars, which split into five pieces), and I think you'll find it's pretty conclusive.
The master of detective work am I. But quite possibly wrong.
And now you're wondering why she's called "Joinee" Bing, aren't you? Well, okay then: www.join-me.co.uk
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