I only do it for the free tea & biscuits

Just given blood. Let's just say it wasn't as straightforward as the other time I gave blood. For a start I had to answer "yes" to some of the questions, because I've been to Africa. They then had to grill me about the "unexplained fevers" that I'd had when out there.

Then I suddenly remembered that I'd also been to Morocco, so that sparked another, albeit briefer, round of questions.

Then when I went and sat on the bed they realised the barcode was the wrong colour - I should have had a "regular donor" barcode, not a "returning donor" barcode, because I last gave blood less than two years ago.

Then when they stuck the needle in it hurt a bit, so they had to rearrange it a bit so that it felt merely very uncomfortable.

When it finished the nurse checked I didn't feel faint, and then pulled the needle out. It was at this point that I started to feel a bit odd. Thirty seconds later I had to say to her, "Erm, now I feel faint."

She immediately sprang into action.

"CAN WE HAVE A WEDGE PLEASE?!"

Suddenly the head of the bed is dropped down, my legs are lifted up and some wedge-shaped piece of blue gym apparatus is stuck under them. It was fantastic - so exciting. Unfortunately I also felt like utter shit. The last time I felt like that was when I had two teeth pulled out as a 13 year-old and then looked at them. That time I didn't get given a leaflet entitled "Feeling Faint" though.

And I got a sticker saying "Be Nice To Me, I Gave Blood Today", which I am now proudly flaunting in front of, well, no one because I'm the only person here.

But I know what you're thinking, so I'll put you out of your misery. Tea and ginger sponge. Yes, ginger sponge - at Riverside Christian Centre you don't just get biscuits, you get a choice! Biscuits, crisps or cake.