The Milkybars Are On Me!

I received two good pieces of news in the post yesterday. Firstly, for my PGCE school placements next year, I shall spend the spring term in an independent school (how the hell did I manage that?) and in the summer term the placements is pretty unsurprising. The best thing is that I shall not have to find somewhere new to stay at any point next year.

The second good piece of news is that I have won over 850,000 euros in the International Draw of the Spanish Lottery! Woo-hoo! I'm rich! I'M RICH BEYOND MY WILDEST DREAMS! It's currently being held by Euro Security Company S.L. and they will take 10% of the winnings, but that still leaves me with over a quarter of a million. Now, I'm not strictly supposed to tell anyone I've one, but if it's just between you and me, then...

...oh, hang on. Oh shit! It's not me who's won! There's been some kind of mistake. I thought it was odd that I won something I never entered. I've just looked at the envelope again and it was addressed to some chap whose surname is HACHARD, not Hatchard. Oh no, this poor chap has won all this money and he'll never know.

Wait, hang on, if you know anyone by the name of PHILIP HACHARD, please get in touch with him and point him in this direction. I'll put the letter up here so he can download it and print it himself, and make the claim. It's funny actually, the crest in the top left hand corner of the letter looks all fuzzy and distorted, almost as if it were some kind of fake. But it can't be, clearly. I mean, who would play a cruel trick like that?